now that we have had a night of rest and regained conciousness we are ready to attend The Masters. We decide that we need some cuban cigars before we enter the tournament so since david can grow a full beard in 5 minutes we decide to let him go and purchase them. when dave returned he had a box of 50 cubans that looked beautiful, we then entered the tournament.
At first we did not know what to think there were people everywhere and cameras everywhere. we decided to go over to the practice range to see what the pros were up to, charles then grabbed the box of cigars and we all lit up and nice fat cuban. when we arrived at the range we decided it would be fun to go and heckle Tiger Woods, with jokes like tiger if you had one for hole you would have played a whole round and other jokes that offeneded him. we then moved to my boy john daly and brought out the air horn. this is when security had to much of us and asked us to leave the practice range due to the fact that we would blown the horn every single time a golfer was comming down on the ball causing them to slice the golf ball and get really pissed. therefore causing us to be removed from the practice range for the day.
We then move over to the food stands were Dave decides that he needs to buy 10 hot dogs for himself because the cigars have made him hungry. Dave gets to the stand and realizes that we have spent alll of our cash on the cigars so dave gets the bright idea of grabbing the hot dogs and running away without paying so charles and ryan follow, Augusta National Security try and catch us but we run into the ladies washroom and hide in a stall. we then find some makeup in the bathroom since we are being looked for charles grabs the makeup and we all put makeup on our face to hide from the security. when leaving the bathroom a young boy stares and yells look mommy a nam with makeup on causing dave to strike the child with the back of his hand. the mother then responded by beating dave to the ground with her hand bag causing a large curfufall. the security then saw the fight and ran back over remebering that we were the ones that had stolen the hot dogs. Dave was then taken to the ground by the security, Charles and Ryan tried to beat the crap out of the guards but there was just to many of them. after the guards got us under control they searched us to find our tickets, once they found them they cut our tickets into pieces and took us to the entrance to the golf course. we were then told that if we ever set foot on the property again we would be arrested and put to death, Ryan then took the air horn and blew it in the guards ears defining them and the three guys ran away laughing.
See Chapter 5http://davelovesmonica.blogspot.com/
Friday, February 11, 2011
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Dave, Ryan, and Charles Get Lucky AKA "Go to Masters"
The Masters: a tournament that is known by any golfer it is the tournament of all tournaments and the dream of every young golfer. However the torunament is almost impossible to get into unless you have tickets. The problem was that Dave, Ryan, and Charlie didnt know how they were gunna get their hands on some tickets. Untill Charlie got the bright idea to go out for Daves 18th birthday and find some strippers.
During this time at the adult club we decided to buy dances from the beautiful ladies. Dave then came to the conclusion that we had all lost our wallets during the process of riding the mechanical bull that was located in the middle of the adult club. when the fine ladies asked us for the money we decided to run seeing as this seemed like the logical idea at the time. when we ran out side the ladies chased after us, while trying to cross the road they were struck by an n coming ice cream and flattened to their death. feeling relieved the three friends then sat down on a near by bench when trouble erupted again.
When the ladies had vacated the adult club the pimps had also ran to the doors to see what the curfuffal was all about. when they reached Ryan the pimp asked sharply where did my ladies go "in real life this statement would have been much worse :p" Ryan replied with a grin they are now being used as pot hole fillers. the pimp then turned to the street to see three bodies drawn out all over the pavement. the pimp began to fret because since the three buddies were under age and not supposed to be in the adult club the pimp would lose his club if the police were notified of these deaths.
However the pimp then began to smile as he reached into his pocket, while doing so Dave turned to Charles saying that he really didn't think they were gonna get out of this one alive. the pimp hen pulled his hand from his pocket and in his hand he was holding three green tickets, which read "VIP Passes To Augusta National For Masters". the three friends looked at each other like it was a dream, when the pimp said boys if you keep this quiet i will give you these three tickets for free of charge as long as you dont tell anyone about our road kill over there. the three friends agreed to this offer and snatched up the tickets, then heading home to compete in more of the flip a cup championships at young Ryans house.
Read chapter 2 on David Nugents Blog
http://davelovesmonica.blogspot.com/
During this time at the adult club we decided to buy dances from the beautiful ladies. Dave then came to the conclusion that we had all lost our wallets during the process of riding the mechanical bull that was located in the middle of the adult club. when the fine ladies asked us for the money we decided to run seeing as this seemed like the logical idea at the time. when we ran out side the ladies chased after us, while trying to cross the road they were struck by an n coming ice cream and flattened to their death. feeling relieved the three friends then sat down on a near by bench when trouble erupted again.
When the ladies had vacated the adult club the pimps had also ran to the doors to see what the curfuffal was all about. when they reached Ryan the pimp asked sharply where did my ladies go "in real life this statement would have been much worse :p" Ryan replied with a grin they are now being used as pot hole fillers. the pimp then turned to the street to see three bodies drawn out all over the pavement. the pimp began to fret because since the three buddies were under age and not supposed to be in the adult club the pimp would lose his club if the police were notified of these deaths.
However the pimp then began to smile as he reached into his pocket, while doing so Dave turned to Charles saying that he really didn't think they were gonna get out of this one alive. the pimp hen pulled his hand from his pocket and in his hand he was holding three green tickets, which read "VIP Passes To Augusta National For Masters". the three friends looked at each other like it was a dream, when the pimp said boys if you keep this quiet i will give you these three tickets for free of charge as long as you dont tell anyone about our road kill over there. the three friends agreed to this offer and snatched up the tickets, then heading home to compete in more of the flip a cup championships at young Ryans house.
Read chapter 2 on David Nugents Blog
http://davelovesmonica.blogspot.com/
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